The Top 10 Myths in Photography

There is a mythical photographer roaming around us. He is the greatest photographer the world has ever seen (but some mad scientist has cloned 1,000,000 copy of him, but he does not know that, so don’t tell him!) and I am lucky to have interviewed him. He would like to tell us the top 10 myths in photography.

1. I am a naturally talented photographer and I don’t need to learn about photography. I was born with good eyes and is creative and artistic. I don’t need to read any books, take any courses, or learn about photography from anyone.

2. I never read camera manuals, they are for people who can’t take photos. Most camera functions are superfluous anyway. The auto everything mode is all I need. The modern camera is so intelligent, in fact more intelligent than any human brain except mine.

3. My photos looked terrible because my Cankony D50000 is already 6 months old and it’s last millennium technology. I need to buy the brand new super duper Cankony D90000SEi that has quadruple Expedigionic-ultra-AI XXIX image processors, 982.8MP sensor that can shoot at 5,000 frames per second and shoot noiseless photo with incredible details at ISO 1,638,400. This camera will transform my photos!

4. My walk around lens is really limiting my photography. I need to buy the Tamigma 10-800mm f4-5.6 super-zoom. It’s great to have a super-zoom so I can use every focal length, I really need that! And wow, 800mm telephoto is really going let me take great photos, I can shoot something really far away!

5. My photos still looked terrible and it’s the fault of all my consumer grade lenses. I’ll go and buy a whole new set of profession “Luxury” grade lenses. I am sure if have the Cankony 14-24mm f2.8 SUM, 24-70mm f2.8 MegaVR SUM , 70-200mm f2.8 MegaVR, 35mm f1.4 SUM, 50mm f1.2 SUM, 85mm f1.2 SUM and 95mm f2.8 MegaVR SUM macro, then photos will be great!

6. I don’t need to learn about post-processing on a computer. If I have a good camera and good lenses, then my photos will look good. The reason why my photos don’t have color as good as the pros is simply because my lenses are not so good. When I have the money, I will buy the $156,990 Cankony 83mm f0.9. That lens is the best in the world and will give great color to any photo!

7. Even though I take pretty good photos now with my present camera body and lenses, but if I don’t keep buying and upgrading my camera and lenses every year, my photos will become horrible because the camera and lens makers have program a function in all cameras and lenses that will gradually degrade the photo quality automatically after one year. It’s a conspiracy that very few people know about.

8. I like taking night shots of the city, but it is usually too dark, but luckily my super smart camera will pop-up the flash automatically to illuminate the whole city so I can get a good shot.

9. Full frame cameras are just so much better than cropped frame cameras as far as perspective is concerned. My rich friends and the pros using a full frame Cankony with a 16mm lens can take a photo from this spot that looks so much better than my APS-C Cankony with 10mm lens. Even though the field of view and framing is the same with both camera/lens combo, but the photo taken with the full frame camera just looks so much more natural and attractive! (Disclaimer, I do not own a full frame camera and have never seen or done a real life comparison to prove my point, but believe me, I just know!)

10. I am the most misunderstood person in the world. It’s lonely and tragic to be a naturally talented photographer who just knows everything without having to learn it. I stay on internet forums all day to explain why everyone else are wrong, but they all don’t seemed to understand that I was only trying to help them understand the truth and they have the guts to say that I am the rudest person in the world!

Advertisements

5 thoughts on “The Top 10 Myths in Photography

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention The Top 10 Myths in Photography « The World According to Roland -- Topsy.com

  2. This was the funniest article I’ve ever read! 10 thumbs up! I laughed my **s off with number 8!!!hahahahaha! Take care and keep up the great work! 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s